Who doesn't like reading a really good book, article, column, etc. by a outstanding writer. But for me there are times I'd rather read about the author and get to know who that person is. Those times and experiences that have made them the person they are and how those times influence how they interact with people. I guess we could call it the "pull back the curtain" and "sneak a peek" approach in getting to know them. I mean really everyone likes reading a personal story about someone else!
So today I start a column with my LifeWorks blog called "Snapshot". This column will be about a time in my personal life that had an affect on who I am today and will offer you a peek behind the curtain of my life. It could be an incident that happened, a person that I have known, something funny, something sad. My hope is whatever is written will help you get to know me. That "Snapshots" will be fun to read and offer a bit of wisdom.
I had the great fortune in my first profession of my life to be a minister. That surprises many people...not sure if that's a good or bad thing come to think of it. Being in the ministry provided me tons of experiences that most people will never have. There were so many 'life' moments that occurred at any time that quoting the Boy Scouts, you just had to "be prepared".
When I was 22 years old, I got my first call that a gentleman was at the local hospital and close to dying. If I remember correctly he was a retired farmer in his 80's. As I entered his darkened hospital room, he opened his eyes and I introduced myself and who I was. I told him that a family member had asked me to visit him. He was very close to checking out and leaving this earth. I said all the right things that I had been taught to say at a moment like this. I was caring, called him by his first name, did my best to offer comfort. Not bad for a 22 year old. The old man listened intently and looked me straight in the eye. It may sound funny but I was pretty proud of myself. I mean after all I'm a 22 year old! What don't you know at that age. But then the tables were turned. I'll never forget that my hands were on the bed railing. He took his withered hand and tightly squeezed my hand and looked at me and said, "Do something I can't go yet!" There was a real sense of urgency and a hint of panic in his voice. He repeated himself, "Boy do something I'm not ready and I can't go yet." My first thought was I don't remember being in class and going over this particular issue! I had no answer that would satisfy him. Talk about feeling inadequate. The look in his eyes is something I've not forgotten...he was serious in his request. And it was one I couldn't do anything about.
Later that day the old farmer passed away. Not sure if he got things worked out the way he wanted it or not. My guess is he didn't.
What did I learn? Several things that I share with people in many of my presentations. First of all today is all you have... period. No one and I do mean no one has a guarantee they will be here tomorrow. We're all one heart beat from the end. Second, whatever needs to be resolved with another person should be attempted as soon as possible. I understand it takes two to resolve an "issue" but have the knowledge that you tried. Third, whatever you do have no regrets at the end of your way. And finally, live your life to fullest...there are no dress rehersals.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Where Have All The Leaders Gone?
Take a look around where you work. Maybe in your church. Your child's sport's team. What about your city, state and even federal government. Stop and look in your own family. Has it struck you that our society has a shortage of competent, inspiring, dedicated leaders? For all the woes we face in our country and families today, as a society we need to be about the business of identifying new potential leaders.
Dale Carnegie was a master at identifying potential leaders. Once asked by a reporter how he managed to hire forty-three millionaires, Carnegie responded that the men had not been millionaires when they started working for him. They had become millionaires as a result.
The reporter next wanted to know how he had developed these individuals to become such valuable leaders. Carnegie replied, "Men are developed the same way gold is mined. Several tons of dirt must be moved to get an ounce of gold. But you don't go into the mine looking for dirt," he added. "You go in looking for the gold."
That's exactly the way to develop positive, inspiring, dedicated leaders for our businesses, families and communities. Look for the gold, not the dirt; the good, not the bad. The more positive qualities you look for, the more you're going to find.
HAVE YOU MADE IT A PRIORITY TO FIND POTENTIAL LEADERS AND SUPPORT THEM?
Dale Carnegie was a master at identifying potential leaders. Once asked by a reporter how he managed to hire forty-three millionaires, Carnegie responded that the men had not been millionaires when they started working for him. They had become millionaires as a result.
The reporter next wanted to know how he had developed these individuals to become such valuable leaders. Carnegie replied, "Men are developed the same way gold is mined. Several tons of dirt must be moved to get an ounce of gold. But you don't go into the mine looking for dirt," he added. "You go in looking for the gold."
That's exactly the way to develop positive, inspiring, dedicated leaders for our businesses, families and communities. Look for the gold, not the dirt; the good, not the bad. The more positive qualities you look for, the more you're going to find.
HAVE YOU MADE IT A PRIORITY TO FIND POTENTIAL LEADERS AND SUPPORT THEM?
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Fathers...Who Needs Them?
Let's be honest. When it comes to the holidays we celebrate in this country, one in particular ranks fairly low on the holiday ladder. I mean Halloween, Easter, July 4th, Memorial Day and others in many ways garner more attention... and dollars spent. Now give Hallmark its due. There is a dollar to be made with this holiday so I guess that's good as we strive to turn our economy around...(wink)
I would contend that a particular national holiday needs to leapfrog many of our current U.S. holidays and dare I say challenge Christmas for that top spot. Keep in mind when God sent down the 10 Commandments with Moses there was nothing about observing Christmas in them. Not a word. BUT there were instructions about FATHERS. There it is in Commandment #5..."Honor your father...." I read all Ten and found nothing about Christmas...which most people in some way spend time and money on and will tell you its the most important holiday. Not to...well...even if you go into debt...you just do celebrate Christmas. Duh. We measure the economy of the greatest nation on earth by how many dollars are spent at Christmas to determine if we had a 'good holiday season'. I'm not here to bash Christmas. Although I do have some opinions if you'd ever care to hear them.
Next Sunday could well be the most important holiday of the year...Father's Day. If you look at Father's Day from a scriptural perspective, I can build a bullet proof case for Fathers over mangers, wise men, gifts and cute adorable children..(mine once)...dressed as angels.
I can build a huge case for the need and support of fathers in today's society. Who cares if a kid gets presents at Christmas if there is no father or even a male figure in that child's life! Many of our issues with children, young people, and even young adults stem from the fact that there are NO fathers involved. When did this society dumb-down the importance of fathers. The need of fathers crosses all social and economic landscapes. From poor neighborhoods, to the guy in the corporate boardroom, to the man maybe sitting in church, they all need to step up to the plate and fulfill their roles as fathers.
Sadly a good deal of men don't recognize the role of being a father. Simply being a 'donor' to an egg to create a human being is not being a father! That is at its best just fulfilling a biological step in making a baby. And oh, for men today, please understand that an infant grows into a child, then an adolescent, then a teenager, young adult, a grown up adult, and maybe someday a father themselves.
So who needs fathers? Well their children do. The mothers of their children do. Our schools do. The churches they may attend do. Our places of business do. Country clubs do. Government does. Little League teams do. Children's clubs do. I mean really we need fathers everywhere we turn.
In 2010, I would guess we have less fathers then we did 20 years ago. Oh sure we have more children, but less fathers. The need for loving, competent, interested, time-giving fathers may well be at a critical stage in our country. Mothers have been bailing fathers out for too long attempting to fulfill both roles. In my opinion, Moms were never meant to do both...they're just capable of pulling it off sometimes. But even Moms have limits.
So here comes Father's Day on June 20th. I have a father who is 81 years old and as I've gotten older I'm amazed at how smart he has become! I'm not sure my father graduated from High School. I know he's a decorated Korean War veteran spending 4 years in the Navy. I know he was gone for weeks at a time when he worked as a fireman for the Chicago Northwestern Railroad. I know when he worked for the local factory and it went on strike, my father picked up a job with a survey crew to earn some extra dollars for food. My Dad held the stick that the other guy looks at through his scope. Dad said they called it the "idiot stick."
I know that when my dad faced the challenges of drinking he got help and has mentored countless others throughout the years. And I will always remember watching my father hold my mother's hand the last hours of her life as she slipped away from him. My father was not perfect and he would tell you so himself. But I do know this. He worked at being a father...he learned about being a father...he taught me about the cost of being a father, and without his example, both good and bad, I'd be less of a father today.
The other day in an elevator, a woman turned to another and said, "Oh my gosh its June already and I need to start thinking about Christmas gifts." Ugh
Maybe some of us can spend more time thinking and planning and promoting strong, loving, involved fathers for our children. That would be the best gift ever!
I would contend that a particular national holiday needs to leapfrog many of our current U.S. holidays and dare I say challenge Christmas for that top spot. Keep in mind when God sent down the 10 Commandments with Moses there was nothing about observing Christmas in them. Not a word. BUT there were instructions about FATHERS. There it is in Commandment #5..."Honor your father...." I read all Ten and found nothing about Christmas...which most people in some way spend time and money on and will tell you its the most important holiday. Not to...well...even if you go into debt...you just do celebrate Christmas. Duh. We measure the economy of the greatest nation on earth by how many dollars are spent at Christmas to determine if we had a 'good holiday season'. I'm not here to bash Christmas. Although I do have some opinions if you'd ever care to hear them.
Next Sunday could well be the most important holiday of the year...Father's Day. If you look at Father's Day from a scriptural perspective, I can build a bullet proof case for Fathers over mangers, wise men, gifts and cute adorable children..(mine once)...dressed as angels.
I can build a huge case for the need and support of fathers in today's society. Who cares if a kid gets presents at Christmas if there is no father or even a male figure in that child's life! Many of our issues with children, young people, and even young adults stem from the fact that there are NO fathers involved. When did this society dumb-down the importance of fathers. The need of fathers crosses all social and economic landscapes. From poor neighborhoods, to the guy in the corporate boardroom, to the man maybe sitting in church, they all need to step up to the plate and fulfill their roles as fathers.
Sadly a good deal of men don't recognize the role of being a father. Simply being a 'donor' to an egg to create a human being is not being a father! That is at its best just fulfilling a biological step in making a baby. And oh, for men today, please understand that an infant grows into a child, then an adolescent, then a teenager, young adult, a grown up adult, and maybe someday a father themselves.
So who needs fathers? Well their children do. The mothers of their children do. Our schools do. The churches they may attend do. Our places of business do. Country clubs do. Government does. Little League teams do. Children's clubs do. I mean really we need fathers everywhere we turn.
In 2010, I would guess we have less fathers then we did 20 years ago. Oh sure we have more children, but less fathers. The need for loving, competent, interested, time-giving fathers may well be at a critical stage in our country. Mothers have been bailing fathers out for too long attempting to fulfill both roles. In my opinion, Moms were never meant to do both...they're just capable of pulling it off sometimes. But even Moms have limits.
So here comes Father's Day on June 20th. I have a father who is 81 years old and as I've gotten older I'm amazed at how smart he has become! I'm not sure my father graduated from High School. I know he's a decorated Korean War veteran spending 4 years in the Navy. I know he was gone for weeks at a time when he worked as a fireman for the Chicago Northwestern Railroad. I know when he worked for the local factory and it went on strike, my father picked up a job with a survey crew to earn some extra dollars for food. My Dad held the stick that the other guy looks at through his scope. Dad said they called it the "idiot stick."
I know that when my dad faced the challenges of drinking he got help and has mentored countless others throughout the years. And I will always remember watching my father hold my mother's hand the last hours of her life as she slipped away from him. My father was not perfect and he would tell you so himself. But I do know this. He worked at being a father...he learned about being a father...he taught me about the cost of being a father, and without his example, both good and bad, I'd be less of a father today.
The other day in an elevator, a woman turned to another and said, "Oh my gosh its June already and I need to start thinking about Christmas gifts." Ugh
Maybe some of us can spend more time thinking and planning and promoting strong, loving, involved fathers for our children. That would be the best gift ever!
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